Things I Would Like to Say....

.... to some people at the gym:

• It is perfectly fine if you decide that step class isn't for you. But please put your equipment away before you storm out of the room so that someone else doesn't have to clean up after you.
• It's okay to go get your baby cause he's crying. This time he wasn't ready to be left in the child care; keep trying & one day he will be ready. (note - this one's in a really gentle tone cause my heart does hurt for this poor lady who is trying so hard to get out of her house & do something good for herself.)
• If you are sweaty, please wipe off the equipment when you are finished. Ewwwww.
• Why, yes I did signal for that parking spot. So you can take your attitude elsewhere.

And finally:

• No, I do not have a problem taking a 20 minute shower when there is hair-washing involved. I only wash my hair on the days when I am in the pool. I take my time getting to the showers so that everyone else has an opportunity to get in first. I make sure that there is at least one shower empty when I get in, and I do check to make sure that nobody is waiting for an empty stall. You were inconvenienced in no way, so I'm not entirely sure what your problem is, but I know that sending death glares in my direction won't get anything solved. (Especially when I am most definitely a Queen of Death Glares.)

The scary part? I am most definitely not PMSing right now.

The sad (?) part? I would never say any of these things in real life.